Sometimes I feel like I'm operating at a higher frequency.
By which I mean not that I am somehow above anybody else, but rather that my needles are jumping.
For me this is what anxiety looks like, a shaky, spiky, scratchy line and it's high up, in my head. Utterly disconnected from my gut, which is centred and whole, vast and calm.
There's a well known metaphor that we are the sky and our thoughts and moods are the weather, passing through. Sometimes turbulent, but always temporary.
We are as vast as the sea and yet often I feel caught in the froth. Far removed from the calm, quiet depths as I am tossed about on the surface. White water rafting.
And sometimes I think that my desire to control comes from this place, ever gasping for breath, grasping for something solid, immutable.
If only I could see clear to just let go. To drift out of my head and down, down to the the ocean of my heart. For this is where I will find clarity, calmness and truth.
There is such noise in being in my head. There is chatter and the constant need to fill the gaps.
In my centre, in my heart and gut there is quiet, stillness and, if I care to stay long enough also authenticity. The only solid and immutable thing, the quiet actuality of who I am.
I don't really do new years resolutions - they are too prone to failure. I do like to reassess a bit though. Take a look at where I am and where I want to be.
So for 2014 my focus is spending more time in my calm, in my still, in my quiet - this means getting out of my head.
This is the year to start operating at my optimal frequency.
What's your focus for this year?
